While we have been busy elsewhere solving some extremely important philosophical questions ( How to flirt with four women at the same time without mixing up the chat windows and such like), a coup has been attempted against our Lordship by the newly appointed dictator. As we have said many times before, democracy is for you; we revel in our Lordship, and any attempts to question our magnificent self would be crushed ruthlessly.
After intense confabulations with the Overlord who has been too busy driving his (tax-payer paid) Mercedes and drinking his (Tax-payer paid!) Vodka to pay proper attention to his empire, we have decided to issue a fair a warning before we take drastic action against these minions. Yes, with great power comes limited benevolence. Repent. Admit to your mistakes and entrust your life to us. Dedicate yourself anew to spreading our name further and farther.
Otherwise, the Bureaucratic Overlord and his mighty Army of one pen will strike. Passports will disappear, visas will be canceled and the full force of the Overlord’s Bureaucratic skills (hitherto hidden) would be on display. Pen is mightier than the sword. Wielded in the Overlord’s skillful albeit unsteady hands, it acquires a life of its own. You can hide but you cannot escape his zeal.
Send your apology. ASAP. In triplicate. Times Roman, 12, margins .5. Sealed in a white envelope with a apology printed clearly in blue or black ink on the top right corner. Beware: Ignore any of these details and the Overlord would consign your letter to his dustbin files.
Admittedly, even our magnificent, infallible, and supremely intelligent self has made some mistakes none more greater than appointing this evil man as the chief counsel ignoring the claims of this gentle soul. We have no doubts that the coup has been instigated by the evil Bongo. The Marathai Manus and the (wo)manus–not used to the guiles of the Bongs– are innocent victims. We forgive them. In fact, we do one better. While retaining the dictator in her current position, we appoint the gentle soul as her chief counsel. Guide her well. Enjoy the fruits of our Kingdom. Respect our authority. Such simple rules should rule your life, ‘o Gentle soul!
As for the evil man him self, we should have taken suitable action the day we heard him passing some disparaging remarks about Delhi. (1) Anyway, he shall be severely punished for his indiscretions. Not only would he be constantly stalked by the deposed dictator wearing his fascist boots, but he is also given the task of interpreting and explaining all of Jyo’s 2757 comments on this blog. If this task doesn’t kill him, we wonder what else will! But we fear not, having full confidence in Jyo and her articulation.
And for once and for all: Down with Bongs. Down Down. Ganguly is lazy! Ray is overrated! Tagore is nonsense! And even Bong women are not hot. (2)
Now we have settled this disturbance in our kingdom, we go back to solving life’s more pressing problems.
1. Just because Delhi’s culture is ruled by ”don’t give me a traffic ticket or else I will call my uncle who is minister’s PA’s driver” it doesn’t mean Delhi is an overgrown village. Beware. One word against Delhi and we will export the blueline buses (and their drivers!) to your city.
2. We claim Nandita Das as a Delhite. In fact, she is one!
Filed under: Personal Stuff
In these days of “fraudulent dictators”, “wimpish dictators” who look like cringing sort of chaps in some fuckn boots, who dismally uncomfortable with “Intelligent women with true blue attitude and confidence”, and who struggle with something in between legs and just mumble “err, she is HOT MAN”, when a visually intoxicating creature struts her stuff nonchalantly through the crowds of wagging tongues they mumble, can we expect shockingly seducing, horrificly monstrous evolutionary theories like the one “Eugenics”- the outrageous maniacal mass murder phenonmenon (Hitler) from them?
Nope.we can see this in this post itself. R, sorry, for being brutally honest.
Both Delhites and Bengalis are “True Blue SNOBS”
one is “Arty Chauvnistic Snob” who indulges in “Social Commentary”, wedded firmly into the erstwhile much celebrated phils and draws a lot of comfort from Circa xxxx, due to the absense of forever-dwindling sense of identity, while the other is “Loud and Garrulous Pulp like Snob” with no remarkable qualities and unresolved physique.
Mumbai – does it have a character? full-time working class with borrowed phils, where success stories are made and circled / shirt curcuited around. Does it have substance? Global Warming would sink this stinking city soon.
-Firm South Indian with a staunch Point of View.Conscious of her imperfections.
Hey Jyo. I said the Bong women are hot in the sense that most young males here will appreciate and sometimes even by the standards of the sublime twist you put on the definition . I didn’t say they aren’t pathetic SNOBS! As for South Indian snobbishness? Wow, that can turn the blood into ice crystals.
(I can’t believe I am indulging in this discussion with a crowd as young as my kids
My dear lady
my recent comment was not aimed at you.I am perfectly in agreement with a few of your opinions. all of us, young, old, at the middle-age crossroads, …gather many human experiences due to our travels, reading,movies etc etc.
a) Bengali Women are HOT. I may not agree with this fully,how do you define HOT? “one moment kick-ignition” or “Sustenance of the same”, or “Periodical bursts”……any woman who has firm opinions on every damn thing, n has the confidence to carry that off, not just empty arrogance or aggression, but walk across the room with a sense of ASSERTION, SHE IS HOT THING FOR ME (a woman) …I guess, dear MEN too nod their heads.A woman who can make great conversations in the bed ,pre & post sex, n virulently playful during sex…she IS HOT
But, I admire, Bengali/east Indian cultured Women like Aparna Sen, Nandita Das, Konkana Sen….BECAUSE OF THEIR “EARTHY, SUBTLE FEMININE CHARM”…you talk to them, they will deluge you with intensity, realism.Sushmita is a spontaneous intellectual.
@Delhi is a hedonist culture…but the youngsters who I met as part of my research, surprisingly, very pragmatic and level headed. “muscular culture”
,
fabulous word, only you could come up with such words. I loved it a lot.yea, the place is crammed with brawny, hefty, muscular men…you shoot one intelligent glance, they crumble away….where else one can find drunk men who misbehave with an air hostess ….Delhi-bound
@South Indian snobbishness is strongly derived from the herbs n spices, the tribes thrive on.n to assuage that steam, you can find entrepreneurs having curd rice in a 7 or 8 star hotels….but Southie-snobbishness does not strike at you..you may get irritated with their aboriginal accents n a bit of parochial mannerisms..u would agree with me, Southies are a lot more disciplined n firm-headed bunch
Jyo,
Dont you think every region of India makes up some or the other reason to be snobbish… I have seen snobs right from Kashmir to Kanyakumari, to use that cliche.
>>>>> I can’t believe I am indulging in this discussion with a crowd as young as my kids
Ruchira,
Age brings maturity. And senility.
Confused,
http://nanditadasonline.com/photofilm.htm
Yuckkkk !!!! Thooo… cheeee… yeechhhhh…
[...] 14, 2007 by BongoP’o'ndit In spite of being stripped of the chief-consul role following our failed (jeopardized really, but all to be revealed later) coup attempt earlier, [...]