On Amitabh and Aishwarya

In an op-ed in Mint(via) Mrinal Pande criticizes Amitabh Bachchan for his regressive attitude towards women. She takes offense to the ritualism which marked the marriage of Abhishek Bachchan to Aishwarya Rai: endless visits to the temples, Aishwarya’s alleged marriage to a tree and what not. She certainly has a point though as an individual Amitabh is entitled to do what he pleases, and to criticize him for believing in ritualism because he is some sort of a role model is stupid. He didn’t ask for it, did he? In a similar article in Outlook, noted Hindi writer, Professor Rajendra Yadav accuses Amitabh of betraying the intellectual legacy of his late father; renowned Hindi poet Harivansh Rai Bachchan who wrote Madhushala. While I agree with Professor Yadav that Amitabh’s ritualism is not in sync with Harivansh Rai’s rebellious poetry, why does he think that Amitbah is the intellectual heir of his father? Is he not then displaying the same prejudices which he so vehemently criticizes?

But what I found more interesting was Pande’s analysis of why Aishwarya Rai would agree to marry into a family which holds such regressive beliefs.

The fact is, as Gloria Steinem pointed out ages ago, unlike men, who are free to sow their wild oats in their youth, young women, especially ex-beauty queens, remain full of insecurities. Most of them perhaps crave a social role that would guarantee them mental and physical security and, of course, approbation. Don’t beauty queens tell the jury routinely that they wish to be like Mother Teresa and help society and the downtrodden, instead of confessing to their dreams about making it big in Bollywood?

This is utter nonsense. Let me explain why.

In Indian politics, relatively few women have been successful. However, those who have tasted power have invariably been women of indomitable spirit and one could say, dictatorial tendencies. In the sixties, when India Gandhi claimed her father’s political legacy, she was dismissed as a mom ki gudiya. In a couple of years, Gandhi showed her true colors and the ‘’syndicate” comprising of political stalwarts like Kamraj were reduced to virtual nobodies. Or look at what is happening now: Jayalalitha is the collective amma of Tamil Nadu while Mayawati lords over B.S.P. Or for that matter Sonia Gandhi, certainly the most powerful politician in India today whose writ runs unchallenged in the Congress party. So why do women like Sonia Gandhi or for that matter her daughter Priyanka Gandhi, don a pallu when it comes to campaigning in the Hindi heartland?

The same reason why Rahul Gandhi wears a khadi Kurta! Because in politics as in movies, success demands that one be a conformist. Rebels look good only on the screen, in real life they are liabilities. Even Periyar, who smashed Hindu Temples was a virtual recluse in the later part of his life–disowned by his political and intellectual heirs: Annadurai and Karunanidhi.

Pandey detects weakness because the winners of beauty contests don’t declare their real ambition: Bollywood. How many of our politicians do that? When was the last time you heard a politician admit that he wants power to make money? Or did Sonia Gandhi confess that the real reason behind her so called sacrifice was to anoint her son as the hereditary ruler of India? Some things are not just not meant to be said, pretenses are important by themselves. In fact, they are celebrated! Remember all those breathless articles comparing Sonia to Mahatma Gandhi?

By Bollywood standards, Aishwarya Rai is old. In a few years time, even Dev Anand will refuse to romance her, at least on screen. She understands this and she has gone ahead and married into one of the most powerful families in Bollywood. Her decision is not a sign of weakness but of ambition.

Sure, there are millions of women in India who need help. They are unable to take even the most basic decisions in life without their father, brother or husband’s permission. Aishwarya Rai is not one of them. Let’s not worry too much about her.