Okay. Enough of serious stuff. Lets get back to sex. As readers know, sex is the raison d’ etre of this blog.
A recent India Today survey demonstrates changing sexuality of Indian men and unchanging attitudes.
Nearly two-thirds of young Indian men expect the woman they marry to be a virgin, but nearly half have had sex with prostitutes, according to a poll.
Oh boy! Words fail to describe this idiocy. I mean all Indian men want to get laid before marriage but yet demand virgins. Someone please knock it in their heads that both are not possible! And why this obsession with virginity? But it has interesting fall outs, for example, a couple of my friends did ”everything” possible with their (then) girlfriends but not the act itself. Why? The girls coyly informed them: ”our virginity is for our husbands.” Yeah, sure!
But I am curious, why are all these surveys conducted among men? Why not ask women? I bet the results will be different. ”I don’t want start teaching my man from A.” A friend had once told me to justifying why she does not want a virgin. Good point.
On a sidenote, Shripriya has a post on breastpumps.
I went shopping yesterday with a pregnant friend to help her figure out all the things she needed to get. Now, you’ve all heard of breast pumps, but we were blown away by this contraption. It raised some critical questions in our minds…
Ah, well, How much more difficult are we going to make it?
I have changed my mind. Actually, the picture is quite hilarious.
Update: I seriously advise you to read this comment. Oh, the sincerity of some is astounding. I guess, I am just a bad kid.
Filed under: Just Plain Weird
Barbarindian
I stand and clap!
One of the best comments, I have ever had the pleasure to read……
Your one long deep kiss
lingers with its scent
-a stain I carry in a close embrace
Jyo
Confused,
You are right. women do deflate their scores.. But I guess there arent so many male prostitutes linking to a large number of women, as compared to female ones linked to a large number of men. The so called sex surveys dont normally include prostitutes…. and hence the skewed figures… Ohh Come on, india today goes and asks men – have you visited prostitutes- some percentage say yes… (that adds to the guys who are non-virgins). To get a real picture, india today must be going to prostitutes and asking them how many different sexual partners they have till now. ..
Doesn’t the above italicized sentence sort of validate the guys’ demand for a virgin? I mean if the first time was special and akin to a well deserved gift, then I suppose one could say, hey, why didn’t I get the special gift?
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A few years ago, when I was in school, I recall that a magazine trashed Dimple kapadia cos she said – Virginity is the best gift a woman can give to a man – or something like that.
Barbarindian,
Egg-zzakk-ly …
You can never repeat the experience of the first time… nor can you ever give 100% ever again the next time. Well, you can give more variations but not the commitment. The feeling of been-there-done-that will always remain..
And most importantly, this applies to both men and women.
Ok, ppl,
how many of you think extra-marital relationships are OK.. I am talking about extramarital now,, not pre-marital.. Ok, I am not really expecting an answer (to my valid question, unlike Shivam Vij who asks stupid questions and even expects answers.. )..
Answer to yourself.. they are not really much different – premarital and extramarital.
Shadows
Interactions and Relationships are not pre-decided. No one works towards “I want to get into extra maritalaffair” or “I want to be concubine” or “I want to be the other man in her life”..things just happen somehow , somewhere and evolve over a period of time, right?
I dnot have anything against “Extra Marital Relationships”, though one hand I am being screamed at by the value & belief systems I grew up with (how can you break down or collapse a nest?)
All of us are driven by different combinations of physical and emotional needs.
As a single woman, I may not get too excited about physical or sexual intimacy, but by emotional comfort of having a man around or the companionship. I am financially independent, and I dnot want anyone to breathe down my neck, watch everything I do. I want to be a free bird, if i feel like going for a long drive midnight, I need not stand in front of someone to ask for permission…in such cases, women seek balance between emotional dependence and individuality and dont mind getting into Extra marital affairs…the third dimension always creates a conflict if it’s not managed well. It has to be completely devoid of expectations, it is a space where individuals seek comfort and emotional security..this is more an evolved n less troublesome equation as both man and woman know how to control the sense of urgency, there’s a mutually understood n practiced pattern of living.
-dying emotion/comfort/intimacy within the marriage or increased interactions with men/other women at work place….are key drivers
But, this may not be the reason for other types of extra marital relationships …:
-changing attitude towards sexual fidelity in the marriagehood
-people get bored easily and constantly look out for avenues to “spice up life”
-increasing desire not to lead predictable and routine lives
-one wants to stop pretending that “they are happy in a marriage”, the same extra marital affair takes an uglier form leading to a battalion of conflicts
Nett Nett :
a) controlled/stable extra marital affairs (EMA) where man and woman seek companionship more than anything else (Platonic?)
b)unstable/materialistic desires driven/emotionally charged up extra marital relationships
If it’s Platonic by nature, I am fine with it at ths point of time.
one of my friends (married) shared something with me “wish I could live on my own without feeling lonely”..why did the individual say that to me? one cant explain this, you may come up with different renditions which may not hold good for the person at the moment.
Watch this movie “Before Sunset”!
but one thing must say, it takes a lot of courage for an individual to get into EMA/EMR and sustain it while going about the recognised marriagehood in the society
”..things just happen somehow , somewhere and evolve over a period of time, right?
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Jyothsna, you are quite right here.
Yeh kya ho raha hai bhai
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World AIDS Day, observed December 1 each year
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